CHILDREN AS OBJECTS
Parents are a reference point for children as well as take care of them, hand down their knowledge or experiences and guide them. But in some cases the opposite happens. I am referring to those parents and mothers in particular, that have not been able to study, having a basic level of education and therefore ignorant of many things, and usually with a disengaged and housewife life. Having the opportunity to follow and help their children to school and homework, from elementary schools to higher, the mother takes the opportunity to learn concepts and terms that she was missing. Conscious of her ignorance cunningly disguised, she quickly acquires and elaborates, treasuring those new notions, and in his own way then able to help children with their homework. Later, when children become adolescents, the same mother remains attached to them with the opportunity to relive a second and different youth, actively engaged in their social life and sharing experiences, good and bad times. Often for the mom the kids become a source of life that give meaning to her drab and dreary existence. And the case here, when a kind of mutualistic symbiosis is established, where both parties need each other for mutual benefit, but while for children it is a natural determined relationship for the parent is something devious and opportunistic. With reference to my previous post about mammismo, it is precisely in these cases that the mamma’s boy finds fertile ground, rooting and showing clearly. The mother often becomes hyperprotective as a result of this symbiosis, and cannot do without because she identifies herself in children’s existence and control it, as long as she can. And that is why, then, these parents force or convince their children to study dance, football or martial arts, because that’s just what they wanted to do when were children. The unfortunate kids have no choice and their freedom is bound by parents breaks or by their temporary absence. The children know they are children and instinctively behave as such without the need for justification, while their mothers hide their ridiculous and insane behavior behind the figure of the modern parent with its obligations and duties. Children need their parents but, in these cases, parents will derive a personal benefit that changes their lives for the better, and it is not uncommon, during a speech, to hear the mom hypocritically asserting: “raising children is not easy and I know something with all that I did for them …. “
Dear mother, you did it for them but also for yourself, you learnt things that you hardly would have learnt alone, you have showed yourself active and committed, children have given you a meaning to your life, and thanks to them you now have a profile on facebook and know what IPad is.