coming out

All posts tagged coming out


Published March 15, 2013 by Tony

Nate's dad letter

This letter written from a dad to his gay son Nate is going viral on the Internet because of its simple, hopeful message of love.
It was posted on the Facebook page of, an organization aimed at empowering youth through its snarky, gay-positive T-shirts, videos and activist campaigns.
I don’t know if this letter is real, but gives me the opportunity to launch a campaign to help and give words of comfort to all the boys, gay or not, who need it. I know how even a few words of understanding or a short chat of encouragement can be useful in times of distress. I am available to do so and I will respond to anyone who needs to hear a friendly voice. Those interested can write me to:


Published February 7, 2013 by Tony



In Naples, the first football team with gay players is born.
The idea came, more than a year ago, to a Neapolitan actor, George Sorrentino, a football fan, who, with the intent to organize a five-a-side football team, began to look for other gay players on social networks frequented by Neapolitan homosexuals.
After receiving more than thirty accessions, the actor was able to finally form a futsal team which he called “Pochos” (a word which means kids in Argentine), team which officially was presented yesterday during a presentation to the “Pinguin cafe” in Naples, with the presence of journalists, the head of Arci Gay sports of Naples and the presenter Cecchi Paone, who long ago had the courage to make a public coming out.
The name “Pochos” was chosen in honor of the former football player of Napoli Ezequiel Lavezzi, who was nicknamed the “pocho” by Napoli fans and that since he is playing in France, has been chosen as the sexiest player by a Ezequiel LavezziFrench gay magazine.
Beyond the sport, this initiative arises mainly because in the world of sport, and football in particular, sexuality is still taboo, with too many cases of homophobia around.
The same silence that usually circulates in racing circles, about the sexual orientation of the players, is indicative of fear and prejudice, someway a symptom of violence.
As Sorrentino says: “In football, players are afraid to declare their sexual inclinations. We do not want to fight prejudice, because otherwise we got ghettoized, but we want to play football with the participation of both gay and ethers, and convince everyone that when you score a great goal, the sexual orientation of those who scored it is not a matter.”
T-shirts, created for the occasion, will have drawn a stylized Vesuvio with a rainbow, in the hope of a “nice time” after the “storm”.

Jacob Rudolph

Published January 25, 2013 by Tony


jacob rudolph

I want to dedicate this short post to Jacob Rudolph who had the courage to confess to his classmates, in New Jersey, about being gay.
Not everyone is able to do such a declaration, at his age and before cameras!
I do not know if it is a good thing that every teenager should do, it depends from case to case, but certainly the guy who does it, then gets rid of a ton and can finally live his sentimental life openly, and walk tall.

Thank you Jacob, thank you really for your bravery that can be an example to others. Be proud of it!


Published October 6, 2012 by Tony

Cruz’s gayness cause a stir

The featherweight boxer Orlando Cruz becomes first in history of boxe to come out as gay while still competing.
The Puerto Rican, who is currently ranked No.4 in the world by the WBO did a historic revelation, he is relieved about his decision but had initial reservations, and in an interview said: “In this sport that is so macho, I kept this hidden for many, many years. I’ve been fighting for more than 24 years and as I continue my ascendant career, I want to be true to myself. I want to try to be the best role model I can be for kids who might look into boxing as a sport and a professional career. I have always been and always will be a proud gay man“.  He praised his mother and sister for their unconditional love and said his father has always backed him, adding: “Like every father, he wants his son to be a full-blooded man, but he is aware of my preference and taste”.
Since boxing as American football is a strong sport where masculinity must prevail, an individual can’t be gay, that’s the common assumption or the homophobic point of view. Again the homosexuality considered as a disorder or handicap.
OMG, why don’t scientists create a vaccine against such an unacceptable mind-set?
Yet, there are historical precedents as the case of Emile Griffith,  with the hope that the warning given to us by Justin Fashanu, will be useful for something.
Being surprised that a gay boxer exists is a little like being surprised that gay people exist, independently from their activity, as well as gay activity exists in prisons, the army or boarding school dormitories.
As Yahoo’s Kevin Iole writes, “a sad sign of the lack of progress in our society that, when Cruz issued a statement on Wednesday admitting his sexual orientation, it was news.
Many people have turned up their nose at this news, while others, for sure, will not watch at his next matches.

My dear homophobe or ignorant friend, put well in your head that, long as there is mankind, there will be  gay people, whether they are workers, teachers, actors, singers or sports celebrities. This’s normal and so must be considered!

Not long ago, the gentlemanly Italian national football manager Cesare Prandelli told something about homosexuality and sport, because in the world of football and of sport in general, there is still a taboo around gayness, while everywhere everyone ought to live freely with themselves, their desires and feelings.



Published November 23, 2011 by Tony

Rugby player becomes gay after an accident

"Ambiguous Desires" of Evgeny Mokhorev

"Ambiguous Desires" of Evgeny Mokhorev

It happened to a former English rugby player of 26 years: – after having had a stroke for a freak accident while training, in which he had broken his neck – Chris Birch woke up gay. “I’m happier than ever, I would change one iota”, the young man told to the Telegraph, explaining that as soon as he recovered, his life changed beginning to have a relationship with a man.

I confess, after reading this curious news I had to laugh, because personally think it is a very unlikely event. At first glance I thought, “It was just a ploy for the guy to coming out, declaring his sexuality and sweeten family and friends judgment”.
As if to say: “He is gay, but not for his fault, it was the unfortunate incident to give him trouble!”
The same applies to other similar news affirming that someone suddenly found himself with a different sexuality. Absurd!
My beliefs are based on scientific data. Debunked for years (thank goodness!) the belief that homosexuality is a disease, long since most scientists agree to attribute the causes of homosexuality to a mixture of biological (genetic), psychological and environmental (prenatal and postnatal) factors, although it still is difficult to quantify separately the various influences. It isn’t, therefore, a matter simplistically only mental or of options occurring during the critical stages of the development, because a priori there is already a well-defined genetic and psychological orientation that, willy-nilly, brings people “to prefer” a sexuality rather than another. Thus, no matter what anyone says or thinks, no one becomes gay at once, and neither after an illness or an accident. If so, it will go back to the ancient assumption that homosexuality is just a  “mental” issue and if it really was so, most of psychologists and psychiatrists, by few sessions, could have healed, long since, a myriad of gay subjects. A validation of this, the fact that no gays in the history has ever “regained” the “normal” sexuality with or without treatment.
Today news travels fast, thanks to the internet too, so we know many more things and facts, that take place in the world, than ever before. Do you remember the case of the boy who already at 6 years old confessed to parents to feel like a “girl” inside. But we can find many other similar cases on internet, such as the recent about Bobby Montoya a seven years old kid who prefers women’s clothing and asked parents to enrol in the “Girl scout”. If these cases do not confirm what has already been widely assumed, namely that homosexuality, as sexuality in general, has a genetic basis, then it means to be blind and biased on this topic that should not even make headlines or dismay because sexuality, whatever it is, must be accepted and understood first. The words “different” or “normal”, usually used, must disappear. When it will come to this, the society will then have taken the right way for that change we are looking for a long time and never put into practice, with no need of tormented “coming out” or other incidents to let other accept a “natural” sexuality