All posts tagged reason


Published February 9, 2013 by Tony

Why do so many people write a personal blog?

Good question!
Years ago, following the guidelines of what a BLOG is, and to be in harmony with the true meaning of this new term, coined in 1997, “Web-log”, that is to say a personal “online diary“, I built my first personal page on the then popular “Windows Live Space “. It was a personal blog, with no obligation, but with a sentimental  quality, seeking to capture a moment in time and talk about everyday life. Speaking of this and that, I realized that in time my pages received many visits, unexpected though welcome. 200 visits a day, for a personal blog were many, perhaps too many, and no need to make so public my personal facts, photos and things about me and my family. Therefore I decided to give a new look to my blog, from an “online diary” to a “microblog” by genre, erasing all previous posts about personal and family stuff. With the closure of MSN space my blog moved on WordPress, where a few years ago I also decided to create this new space in English. Currently, among the Italian blog and this one, I achieve an average of 700 visits per day, and this in addition to being a satisfaction, leads to a different commitment.

But which answer can we do to the original question?

Yea, it’s a way to share, but not to share thoughts and feelings instantaneously, as it happens emailing or writing on Twitter or Facebook.
There, we are more in touch with our friends, while blogging is a way, perhaps, to make new friends? To convey our thoughts to people who do not know, to communicate our views and, if necessary, to find consensus.
Whatever the main reason, at the base, I think, there is a need to communicate, and we prefer to do it yourself while sitting behind the computer. Posting an article with the hope that it will be read by as many people as possible, and excited by this possibility.
Just a basic contradiction!
Not so much for us that we belong to an earlier generation, but from the day when computers and cell phones have become essential technological objects, present in every home, we cannot do without.
A different way of communicating, indirect, seeking contacts while conscious of being alone.
It remains to check whether it worth the trouble, if energy and time devoted to this activity then meet our expectations.
Although we don’t find this on personal blogs, each reader should realize that it is as if in every post virtually is written, in large letters:



Marital Problems causes

Published October 7, 2012 by Tony

Most Separation and Divorce’s cause

Once in my country some dictums about couples or marriage said:
“Women and oxen from your country”
“Women cheat for money or for sex”

Today, these aphorisms are probably outdated but still retain some element of truth.
The indisputable fact that in recent decades separations and divorces increased exponentially leads one to think that, compared to the past, something has changed in “marital relationships”. Likely compared to the past today many things have changed, something for the better and some others for the worse, but we would be wrong if say that nowadays life is more difficult to live, because also for our ancestors life was not so easy.
Family management and a long-term relationship have never been easy for anyone, today as yesterday.

So, what has it really changed or what’s wrong nowadays?

With regard to marriage and life of the couple have been written hundreds of books, where the marriage crisis’s reasons are analyzed, with good tips to avoid more common mistakes and look for happy coexistence.
But I’m sure all the problems can be traced to one only, which by the way, is the only point which differentiates the couples of the past.

At the base of it all is the lack of sacrifice and compromise!

In married life, both spouses can’t or don’t want to give up their needs and their freedom. Many of you will be turning up their noses now, but it is so….

To understand “the couple” we must examine the single individuals.
Compared to the past, today’s young people are used to have more freedom, get every whim or need satisfied. Parents do their best to meet their needs and let them live a very comfortable life. The study and the wish to have economic independence leads women to find a job or advance their career. All this did not happen in the last century, where women were the housewives, taking care of children and house, while the husbands dealt with work and family’s well-being mostly.
Today the roles are standardized with equality of rights.
This is the true and main difference between the past.
Nowadays, no matter if boy or girl, you have your good clothes, your perfume and make-up, your computer, your PlayStation, your sport to practice, your friends, your freetime, pocket money, entertainment, parties and… so on and so forth.
Once married, they both must give up many things… and this is where the problems begin and in the long run the couple’s life becomes stressful and unacceptable.
Provided that other problems have not appeared in the meantime… concerning money or infidelity, for example. Besides, the arrival of children, then, makes the situation worse and is sought greater involvement and patience.

The fact that marriages between persons not so young last longer is a proof. Aged people are more mature and aware of what a “life together” implies, able to adapt better and give up something patiently. For young people, instead, it is not easy to give up things which they still feel the need and that, if ever, their unmarried friends are still enjoying around.
The common-law marriage or the living-together with no legal or religious bonds, got a foothold among young people just because they were aware of their weak points, and a way to get involved and try.

Therefore, if your relationship is in crisis, I believe that it is useless to read books and manuals …. beyond to have an open and honest conversation, through a good dose of patience,  each of you must make an exam of conscience and see if he/she really has been able to give up half of own needs in favor of those of his/her partner.